Slowly losing my wife

[ForGump]

It is possible to too much. You want a partner, not anything less.

Based on what you've written, it's tempting to say you're doing too much, and my guess is, you probably are. But I can't say for sure. It depends on everything else going on in your shared life: taking care of kids, shopping, cleaning, bills & finances, etc. So, you have to ask yourself, looking at everything you guys do for the family, is she a mature, responsible equal partner?

I don't know exactly what you should do. But I think it's best not to frame the question in terms of what it will do to your wife. Frame the question in terms of what's healthy for you. What's going to make you a healthy parent, a healthy adult.

Take care of your kids. Take care of yourself. Give your wife the freedom and space she wants to figure things out for herself.