Yes, it is a great list of positives. I have got to focus on those and avoid the cheeseless tunnels. Some days it is easier to do that than other days. I am sick right now and feeling a bit down.
Talked to H last night and again he was preoccupied and barely communicating. He said I love you but it sounded rather forced... I am going to stop saying it again for a while. If he asks why, I will be honest with him and tell him I'm not trying to force him to keep repeating something he doesn't always seem like he wants to say. I'm tired of things being so complicated. I wish things could just be easy.
I know, I know, I need to work on me right now and take the focus back off of him.
I hate his job sometimes. This living with him 2 weeks and living apart for 2 weeks is awful. But he loves his job and gets a huge satisfaction from it, plus loves making the money he makes.
His job is a blessing in many ways. He makes six figures and gets to feel good about himself. It's just that he is surrounded by so many negative people and there ARE women up there.
I will never forget seeing 907-223-2259 flash across my caller id when he was supposed to be at work. It's some Amy's cell phone number. I think she may be a stripper as I have called and she always answers in a bar atmosphere.
Anyway, if she isn't a stripper...she may work with him, and that thought makes me even more upset.
