where to begin or end?

[Rose888]

I can't remember--is there something objectively objectionable about OM? Like a criminal record?

In general I feel it does more harm than good to try to control who she leaves the kids with on her days--it keeps you too tied up in her life, monitoring things, and puts kids in an uncomfortable position--but if he has a criminal record I would pursue a legal separation agreement with clauses about them spending time with him.