Hanging on and hoping for the best

[BillyHo]

Talked with my IC yesterday. He said that we were doing the "dance" last week. I knew from reading the distancer and pursuer thread just what he meant. Looking from the outside in it so easy to see. As soon as I start to feel a little comfortable W begins to pull away again.

We are slowly but surely coming up on the day she is going to move out. We decided to tell the boys on this coming Sunday. We figured that way we will both be around the whole day to handle it with them. That is going to be tough to deal with. W doesn't seem to grasp the impact that something like this can have on a child. I went thru it when I was 10 and in some ways it still affects me to this day.(I'm working on that in C)

I am not sure how to handle the seperation. I am going to continue to GAL and work on me. I'm just not sure how I should deal with W. She seems to think that things won't be all that different. She says we will see each other all the time because of the kids sports. She said the days during the week I have them overnight she can come over and get them ready for school when I go to work at 4am. My question is, if she is always around how is she ever going to miss me and us being a family. Sandi says for them to wake up they need to feel some kind of loss. We have been communicating very well the last couple of weeks. She does not spew or act mean to me at all. Do I keep doing the LRT or go as dark as possible? Do I keep up this friendly and seemingly positive thing we have going right now? I'm just not sure how to proceed.