Your situation isn't the worst. However, you haven't been practicing DR and as a result, all the anger, resentment and hatred you have now are a result of it. So since you hate your wife so much, go ahead and speed things along. I mean from your tone, you certainly wouldn't shed a tear if she was found dead in a ditch somewhere.
Hi MrBond, I am not sure I follow. I have no hatred towards her, I only took actions to protect myself legally and financially. Trying to look back at it and find the humor, despite all the chaos, threats, false allegations from her, threats from her close friends, and erratic behavior is what has kept me going.
I have spent several weeks scraping along and looking for a 2nd job to make ends meet. I should have acted sooner, but I was stunned and spent the first few weeks angonizing and sad. I had (have) no idea where she was, why she would abruptly curse/hang up on during calls, and why she sent me nothing but rambling and acusatory messages after leaving.
The more I tried to be positive and asked for clarification, the angrier and more accusatory she got. Eventually when I lessened my responses from being overwhelmed, she started impatiently demanding money, property, and divorce.
I realize my own unhealthy dependency on her and how I contributed to issues. The way I perceive how she treated me was the way I allowed myself to be treated and a result of the environment I helped create.
Again, my goal has been to get myself through this the best way I can. I have to accept that I probably ignored some signs in the months leading up to this. That had been planing this and that she has a deep issue I can not fix.
All of sudden she had money issues as suddenly her job of several years started incorrectly depositing her paychecks into the wrong accounts one month prior to her "craziness". Her seething anger that started showing up in and after traditional counseling should have been something I caught on to as well.
It is funny you say I do not care what happens to her. When I was packing up the home I came across something that truly hurt me. It was her "wishing" vile harm on me with the end result happening in a manor similar to what you describe above.
