Hi Exquisitetobe, I think it is useful to have these reflective phases. One thing I have really tried to do is take on the 'responsibility for me' mantle and let go of the XH stuff. My life is mine to live now and how well I live it is up to me.

I didn't really take to the whole 'sit with a blank piece of paper and think about goals' thing. But last Xmas, someone bought me a pretty little notebook and it became my goals book. If I think of something I would like to do, I write it at the top of a new page. then just below it, I write the first step I can take. Next time, something pops into my head, I grab the book and update it. I have 15 or so goals on the go at the moment. These include - learning to dance, arranging a holiday next year, making time to care for Mum, keeping in touch with old friends, getting finances organised....and so on.

When I feel myself drifting, I grab the book and update it. I think it has helped me move forward and I do feel a sense of achievement when I have done the goal and tick off a whole page...

What direction would you like your life to go in now? You are mistress of your own ship and destiny.....xx

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus