Wife has filed for divorce

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I'm working with the DB coaches over the phone and the thing I learned was to look for small victories. If you're waiting for the, "I miss you, let's make this work.." you'll be waiting a while and can lose hope when you may be making progress.

It may or may not be worth reading in to, but here's what my coach always asks me.

If you were doing everything right and you felt like your husband (wife) was feeling a tiny bit better toward you, what do you think that would look like? For each of us it could be entirely different. Maybe for you it's that your wife talks to you about something other than the kids, or goes a whole week without mentioning the divorce, maybe she texts you in the middle of the day about something where she wasn't talking to you at all before.

If you miss those little things, youll lose hope. DB is really sort of a hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

I read somewhere on here to potentially account for one month of hard DB work for every year you've been married. Not that you can nail a time frame on it in any way, but some people might have unrealistic expectations for how quickly they want their spouse to notice their 180 and possibly come back around. So be prepared for a potentially long, exhausting time.