Coffee and spinning

[Coly23]

Thanks for your comments everyone! The jury is still out about the dog although I get daily puppy pictures from D in the hope that they will win me over!!!

Journaling:

Really not doing good at the moment. This time last year we were getting excited about Christmas although I now realise that H wasn't. I am so mad at myself that I used to get so controlling and worry about such trivial things at this time of the year. I regret it so much and wish that writing Christmas cards was my only worry this year. No, in fact i yearn for that now. I just feel so pathetic.

H is probably happy that he doesn't have to put with me this year. He can just enjoy the festive season without all the stress that comes from me. I hate myself so much at the moment.