The one thing that seemed odd was you telling her to smile. That seemed a bit controlling.
To me, it sounds OK. It's controlling in the same way that saying "Have a nice day" or "Drive safely" are controlling. Maybe it's slightly more, but on the grand scale, I think it's OK.
That said, it's interesting to me that you are judging that you are on "the right track" based on her moods. She laughs a few times and you think things are 'getting better' or something?
For example, why was she in your house for so long and around so much to notice changes in decoration if she was just dropping off S? Why were you asking about her bday plans?
I dont necessarily think you are on the WRONG track. I just wouldnt gauge your progress based on her mood.
