And he could have gotten off his a$$ to clean instead of becoming the Ansel Adams of interior photography. Just my $.02
Bttrfly that made me laugh. I did say to him that he was stooping pretty low, and I felt like saying more on the matter but what would th point be?
Kyh - I agree, he is at a strange point, not much pleases him.
Sotto - I wish I could tell him that by choosing to leave he has no right to comment on the housekeeping standards but apparently if I'm not able to keep the house tidy I should work and pay the rent and then he would be the one keeping everything to his highest standards.
Originally Posted By: Rouky
Not now but I truly believe that further down the line you will come out better and healthier than H.
I already feel as a better parent than H, and definitely a nicer person. Not sure if I can "beat him" in the health category, his diet and exercise regime is that of an elite athlete at the moment, he is obsessed with it!
Originally Posted By: HaWho
The spontaneity is fun when it's a restaurant or a neat retail store. It's not so appropriate to be a pop up dad. And, in my opinion, that's what he does when he "pops up." And it's so convenient to critique when he is not the one raising the kids by himself.
Perhaps for you, something politely stated like: "h, when you are here, it would be great if you could help. There is a lot of work to be done. However, if you cannot, then at least do not critique as I am here working very hard to raise these kids day in and day out."
I think this is a boundary issue. He doesn't get to leave and pop up parent in your space.
It is a boundary issue! I spent the weekend sipping on the STFU Smoothies and quickly reapplying the duct tape, because I really wanted to say that's the next time he invades my privacy by taking pictures of the house it will be the last time he steps foot inside. But that would be counterproductive.
I think my pleading for help has worked, H did spent a lot of time with the boys, even teaching S8 how to help me with chores etc. And I made sure I praised H as much as I praised S8 (if not more), and I tried to be as nice as possible about everything. Overall it was a good weekend, we coexisted in a more civil way. H is still avoiding eye contact with me, but he has made some effort with light discussion (on very safe topics). He seemed happy with the kids too which was nice.
I had a good weekend, took S8 to a party and went running twice. The first was a quick run, as I was totally unprepared for the freezing weather, but yesterday's was lovely! I don't ever remember freezing and sweating at the same time before, but as soon as I got going it was actually amazing. The crisp winter air felt so invigorating, I really enjoyed it!
All in all it was a pretty good weekend, and I'm looking forward to the week ahead
"There's nothing sadder than a conman conning himself"
“There is freedom waiting for you, On the breezes of the sky, And you ask "What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, What if you fly?”
