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[2Tours]

Well its Sunday morning and I am just about done reading DR and have read some other good books as well. I find myself learning to understand MLC and that my WS is not really the person I am dealing with. I had dinner with a good friend last night that had dinner with her last weekend, he and his wife were the first and only people my WS told about the affair. He was totally confused on how she could walk away from such a great lifestyle and marriage for so much uncertainty and a total downgrade. He said she seemed very different and he's known her longer than I have. I explained MLC and shared some writings about it for him to better understand what's happening to her and where she is at in this process.

I encouraged him to not push on her to do anything, but to offer to listen to her, as when she does come out of this she will need someone to help her. He told me that he and his wife will not support any relations with WS and OM, but would continue to see her solo. Also, he told me they will do their best to not judge her, but to offer support and hope that she sees the light on what shes doing with her life.

He told me that during the dinner my WS was not negative about me at all and said to them that I was a great guy and gave no reason for the affair. They left the dinner with her completely puzzled at why she is doing this. I encouraged him to read up on MLC, as nothing makes sense of someone in it and there is nothing that can be done until the MLCer starts to acknowledge what's happening.

I am GAL and working on what to do when we enter our trial separation with NC in December, but since she moved out to OM place a couple of weeks ago I am not going to realize much of a difference. WS though is getting her own apartment and working with her counselor as well to deal with her depression/self worth and childhood abuse issues. I think that she is going to be overwhelmed by all of the emotions she will be going through, however she has yet to feel anything to this point, which is telling about where she is with this process.

I haven't heard from anyone on this post in a couple of days, input is always welcome and appreciated.