Journaling. - I had a great day yesterday. Took my D and niece to a dog rescue centre as D really wants a one. I'm still very apprehensive as I'm not an animal person! I go between maybe getting her a puppy so we can bring it up ourselves or an older rescue dog because it means we are giving an abandoned dog a new home. The trouble with this is a lot of them have serious issues and can't be around children. We saw some lovely dogs at the rescue centre but none suitable for our family. However the thing that worries me about having a puppy is that I work full time and I'm not sure how we will look after it. I'll have to have another think...
The dog rescue centre visit did help to take my mind of things but I felt my emotions bubbling at the surface all day. When I finally went to bed I had a good cry. Just feel so hopeless. I just wanted H to text me to find out how we got on at the market. I don't know why he is so resistant to just general contact. He is lovely to me face to face and especially as he is so keen to meet up so why can't he just drop me a simple text, I don't understand...
I think I'm starting to feel anxious about Christmas and D's birthday. I expect everyone else on here is feeling the same about the holiday season. I sometimes feel like I want to go sleep and when I wake up its all over with and everyone can tell me what a lovely time they had and then I know I didn't spoil it for anyone. That's what I am afraid of....
Me - 47 H - 45 D-16 M - 6 years Separated - May 16
Don't leave me behind can't you see me I'm shining... (Years & Years - 'Shine')
