Chapter 4 - Acting As If

[j20a00g]

How do you know if what you are doing is working?

Could it be that things are changing? Keep reading and let me know.

I've been as distant as I can be for the last few months. We don't text/email. When she comes to the house. I don't engage her in conversation at all. She asks me how I am. I give a very positive answer. I don't ask her how she is. I only talk "family business" if she brings it up. There are many loose ends that I'd like to address i.e. Christmas break, family photos, etc. But I've zipped my lips.

She comes to the house - collects s10 sometimes s16 and drops them off. I have offered her a ride home - she has refused, so I stopped offering.

On Halloween she came over and "pitched in" - see earlier post.

In the last week she has started to get involved a in the house, way more than she has been. I've also, not let her.

Last week she cleaned the bathroom and did the dishes.

She asked how the work was coming in the basement. I invited her to come down and have a look. She and I stayed downstairs for 15 min and discussed/brainstormed, etc.

She bought a new shower curtain and installed it

We have no laundry machines currently, so she volunteered to help with that. Washed and folded two loads on the weekend.

So is something changing? Is it her guilt? Is she feeling left out? Has my DB/LRT/180 working?

Any and all insights are welcome.

It's working....remember, YOU are the focus. You are stepping outside of your comfort zones and doing new things. Also being a great dad and thinking less about what ww is doing or how your decisions impact her.

I have been able to kinda of grasp that successful DB is me being stronger and more independent and human than before and if at the "end" it saves my marriage then that's gravy.