Keep Wearing Wedding Band? [Thread #5]

[CT1118]

Where Iare you friend?

I second that. Wherever you are FG, I wish you peace, music, and a night's rest.

[Surfer]

FG

I am also in Limbo. W not sorted mediation - for D but she instigated it. She is no longer moving forward at all. I am not going to pick up her ball.

At first limbo was not nice. Now it is. Don't pick up her ball find things that make you happy. You are going to do things you want to do, focusing on one thing a day. This is a great start. Plan things a little further ahead too when you get into the swing of things.

Try not to worry what she thinks, is doing etc. Focus on something else for a change. Give yourself a break. Be kind to yourself. You are a good man and you are doing the right thing. At times we can't see how well we are doing as we are in the middle of the game and it's confusing. You are doing great. Get that PMA back!!!

Surfer.

[CT1118]

Where are you friend?

ForGump - I hope you are well my friend. You spent enough time here to know we are thinking of you. I hope that energy pulls you back to say hello.

[ForGump]

I've been hesitant to post. An event outside of my control has plunged my situation even deeper into a state of limbo. I've sort of arrived at a place like where JRuss is in, although the timeline for me isn't nearly as long as his (supposedly 2 years).

I've thought about posting about it here, but recently I've also been feeling a bit exposed about this website -- I wonder how anonymous and private it really winds up being.

I've often thought of my new timeline as a "gift of time" for me, but actually I am no longer purposely doing "DB". I am not trying to do "what works". I am not purposely trying to do "180", "GAL" etc. The new timeline is, however, a gift of time for me and my kids: it's a time when I can see them every morning, night and weekends. So I am trying to just love them the best I can, appreciate my daily time with them while I have it, and, as well, I am trying to be happy for myself, without relying on the marriage and my wife for my happiness.

I have let go of my fear -- substantially, anyway, though not wholly -- of the pain I will feel when the family actually breaks up, when my W has left me. I don't think I can prepare myself for it. I'm just going to accept that it will hurt when it happens.

I do think about you all, and appreciate your friendship, however strange it is ... to be friends this way. I'd much rather sit with you in person and have a pint.

[Jug]

Sorry brother. I definitely would love to get together in person with so many people from this board. Do what you need to do. Hang in there.

[AndrewP]

ForGump - thinking good thoughts in your direction. I remember when you joined our little club. You burned so brightly with a need to make things "right".

Your light has been dimmed but it is not out. I know that you have within you the depths of strength necessary to make it down this new journey whatever it may be.

Good luck and I hope to see you here from time to time. You have been a great source of comfort to many of us here but first you need to look after yourself and your kids.

[Coly23]

Lovely words Andrew.

Gump, you have been there for me in the deaths of my despair whilst you were in your own. Take care of yourself and know that we are always here for you.

[mulesqb]

Post only what you are comfortable posting. This place is for you. I know where you are at my friend. It gets better, I promise. But it does take time.

Strength and Honor.

Mules

[ForGump]

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