Hmmm - CT1118 - What do YOU want? We've written back and forth a number of times about the researcher's bias and it looks like you are making an extra effort here to avoid that.
job or eric or one of the other vets can provide you with real advice but would you suggest that her "baking" is proceeding? Is she coming to a place where she would be willing to put in a similar effort to what you have done to be a complete and whole person? You don't want to end up being Chef BoyarCT here again like you have been for her in the past.
If I wanted to be cynical I could suggest that she is trying to hold on to you and manipulate you back into being her rescuer again but from the very narrow window I have it doesn't look like it. She seems to be fairly self-aware as was indicated by her advice to BIL.
If you do meet for coffee do as everyone suggests and keep your expectations at zero. I'd suggest that you focus on BIL and not her.
Good luck. I think you did the right thing by staying as neutral as you have. No expectations.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
