Feeling Lost 3

[srt]

hey guys, I really do thank you for the reply.

re jumping in, that has been my thinking up to now but a few things have happened since that makes me wonder if what I'm doing is working or not.

W and I had a convo last weekend which resulted in me choosing to leave - she was being abusive and throwing insults and I realised I was getting sucked in to justify her behaviour. I simply said I was not going to be treated like that.

In this convo W complained at me that I never call her (which she has mentioned before), not even a "good morning". She also complained about me being awkward and difficult, I assume in relation to the lack of control she has when I have the kids. She has said she wonders what I am waiting for (???), and that she doesn't think the sitch has gone on long enough (meaning needing to D).
She has also brought me small gifts (food) and had increased her messaging to ask how we were and what we were doing when I had kids in recent hols.

I KNOW I mustn't exert pressure but I really don't know how to handle this - she seems incapable of figuring this out!!! I WANT to be with her, and sense she is not done with me.

I've gently asked if she wants to do anything (last week - to no success), and will repeat this week. I'll ensure my demeanour is calm etc and won't get worked up if it is not accepted. I really can't see any other option other than nothing - yes I know it is an option but I've been doing it for MONTHS.

I just can't see any change based on my current approach, yet it seems to be annoying W more than anything.
We are still courteous and pleasant to each other during exchanges, and she does seem to be hanging around for a little longer than usual.

I totally feel in a stalemate, where neither of us are equipped with the tools we nee to improve the sitch. I'm trying the hardest I can to just get on, stay positive, GAL etc. I'm also very apprehensive about going back to MC since I feel we will just get the death certificate of our M.

I don't suppose I have much more to say other than I'm keeping a log of interactions with W. Whether this is useful or not I'll see but it is useful to reflect back on.