Maybe I think amicable is the wrong word for it. My ex and I went through the divorce and things were fairly tense for a while, but now I would say that while we are certainly not friends, the spirit is generally friend-ly. During the drop offs or at a school event, if we see each other, I wouldnt say things are especially cold or hostile, but I think each of us are glad when the encounter is over and we can move on to the next part of the day.
That said, in no way, shape or form would I feel comfortable going to that person's house to make them a 'birthday breakfast' as a way of raising my children to do what is right.
As for the recent discussion in my thread, did I want my ex to stay with me out of 'obligation'? It's a difficult question to answer.
One the one hand, going through the initial ILYBNILWY phase, I didnt realize just how much I had contaminated my marriage - it wasnt until I had the perspective and time to objectively look at my role in the breakdown to really understand the things that I did that were considered hurtful. Like almost everyone on here, I think with a little time and effort, that relationship would have prospered into something better than the original marriage at the best times.
With that said, if I had known that it was my 'last chance' Im sure that things would have reverted and the initial changes I had made would have faded away.
In some ways, the LACK of obligation is what spurred me to make changes that I believe will last.
