In my opinion, there should be no such thing as an 'amicable' divorce when kids are involved.
darknes,
I didn't want to divorce, but I felt like, given the circumstances, that I had a fairly amicable divorce. Imagine my surprise when I took my sons to their first post-divorce counseling session and my xW described the separation and divorce as being "very nasty."
Our perceptions were completely different. By the time my wife had moved out, I'd become a hammer, and I immediately pounded down any nails that popped-up. I felt fine; I had zero tolerance for the WW spew. Apparently (mind reading), she felt beaten-down.
The point is that whether or not the divorce is amicable is in the eye of the beholder. I fought a good fight to keep my family together, and I lost, but when all was said and done, I could hold my head high and honestly say that I was her faithful husband until the end. But, I thought things were relatively sedate (they were). However, my ex-wife, who was determined to split-up the family, viewed the divorce as contentious. Maybe it was her conscience gnawing at her the entire time; I don't know.
So, in my opinion, an amicable divorce is probably not the best litmus test as to whether there was a heroic fight for the family.
