Well, it is official...It is a full blown PA and they might even be living together. At the very least he is staying over.
I know this because after confronting her on Friday (I know, I know) in the nicest, most non-confrontational way I could think of about how I understand how emotional affairs can happen under extreme stress, she blew me off and went back to her depression story.
So I asked her on Saturday if she wanted to hang out (kids were at in-laws) and got a no. Asked if she wanted to get breakfast on Sunday, she said no. So I suspected. And brought her breakfast without notice. He was there. At least I know now.
At first, I wanted nothing to do with her. But now, I am back to thinking I at least want to try. So I will embrace DB tactics now that I know for sure she is a WW. What do I have to lose I guess.