Don't know where I belong.....

[twinmom]

I feel so stuck. Sometimes I feel like running away. I see/know the pain that a WAW causes so I stay and I go through the motions of another day. I truly do not know how to make this better without causing pain to the kids.

H truly believes he is 'strong enough' to control his addiction. Is he right? Who knows, but even if he isn't cheating we aren't making our marriage better!

Right now I'm so stressed/angry/frustrated... we had to redo the kitchen because of water damage from a leaky dishwasher. New cabinets are in but because I picked quartz countertops they won't be in for another 3 weeks. I have no sink & no countertops. I refuse to cook Thanksgiving like this... well H has 4 siblings & parents who live within 25 minutes of us and my mom lives 5 minutes away. No one has offered to host! I am so angry that EVERY holiday I cook (and purchase the food) clean & host everyone but now that I can't no one will step up?!

I made reservations at a nice restaurant downtown Chicago for us. I'm nervous H will invite his family along. (We will then pay for them & I don't want to spend $$ on people who obviously don't care about us)