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Molly22 Offline OP
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I suck at detaching. I need "Detaching for Dummies".

He has odds and ends there. Him moving out was really sudden so I've packed it all up.


Me: 41
WH: 41
DS: 21
DD: 20
DD:18

Dday: Oct 2016
Currently Separated
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Molly,

Are you going to send the odds and ends to your favorite charity?

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Molly22 Offline OP
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Can I drop him off at a charity?


Me: 41
WH: 41
DS: 21
DD: 20
DD:18

Dday: Oct 2016
Currently Separated
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 3,952
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Originally Posted By: Molly22
Can I drop him off at a charity?


Molly,

I don't think so, but you can FedEx him to a small town in South America.

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Molly22 Offline OP
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With no return address.


Me: 41
WH: 41
DS: 21
DD: 20
DD:18

Dday: Oct 2016
Currently Separated
Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 112
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Molly22 Offline OP
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Not the best day. I feel weepy and sad. Didn't sleep well. This morning, I cut myself and it required 8 stitches. I let WS know he wouldn't need to watch DD while I was working because I was taking the day off. All he said to me was, "I thought you had no money". No are you okay? Anything I can do to help? Nothing. He is getting father and farther away and it makes me blue.


Me: 41
WH: 41
DS: 21
DD: 20
DD:18

Dday: Oct 2016
Currently Separated
Joined: Nov 2016
Posts: 250
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Sorry to hear that you cut yourself. I know the past week my brain has been in a complete fog so if yours is as well it is easy to get distracted.

My W is the same, doesn't ask anything caring. Even if I ask her if she's had a good day she just replies "Yes" or "Really good" (she's having an A so of course they are good for her.

I'm a newbie myself, but I'm trying hard to not let her cold distant get to me. It does, obviously, but trying to keep myself in check. My IC gave me a breathing exercise to do where you take deep breaths from the diaphragm and listen to everything around you, and see the objects around you in great detail. For example if you're inside is the wall near you textured? What color is it? Can you hear a clock ticking? Etc.
So far it does help calm me, but not always distract me from the endless thoughts about my W and the OW. I just have to keep practicing to get better at being more mindful of my thoughts. If you find yourself overwhelmed you might give the breathing exercise a try.


Me: 35 W: 32
MR: 2y T: 3.5y
SS11
BD: 11/3/16
EA: 10/26/16
PA: 11/11/16
W asks for S/D & ILYBINILWY 11/13/16
Status: I moved out 11/19/16, GAL
I filed for D: 12/14/16
D-day: 3/10/17
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Molly22 Offline OP
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Thanks, fightin.

If, when we are speaking, I am to ask WS about his day, he will go into great detail. Never asks me a thing. Hasn't asked how I am even once since I found out his affair is ongoing. It's like he suddenly just feels nothing for me at all. It's funny because he was ranting about how his parents only talk about themselves(and they do) but so does he.

I'm lonely and to be really honest, I miss sex and cuddling and all that good stuff. I don't know how to get through this part. I don't think my WS is coming back.


Me: 41
WH: 41
DS: 21
DD: 20
DD:18

Dday: Oct 2016
Currently Separated
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I dont have any solid advice, as I'm in the same boat as you Molly. It feels like I'll never get there and that my husband is gone for sure.

I always try to read the success stories for encouragement though. Those people didnt have any less of a hopeless situation, and their spouses came back.

A lot of the time they're equally scared or emotional, but hiding it. They'll say crazy things and it changes every day. I've noticed this a lot with my husband. His plan changes every day. He doesnt know wtf he wants.


Married for seven years

1 two-year-old boy

BD: 09/16/2016

Separated in different states due to military/school
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Originally Posted By: Molly22
Not the best day. I feel weepy and sad. Didn't sleep well. This morning, I cut myself and it required 8 stitches. I let WS know he wouldn't need to watch DD while I was working because I was taking the day off. All he said to me was, "I thought you had no money". No are you okay? Anything I can do to help? Nothing. He is getting father and farther away and it makes me blue.


Sorry to hear about your cut.

Why did you let him off from spending time with DD? It was arranged already. Not his business if it's for work or not.


34, xw33
M-10, T-18
2D (8 and 5)
Ilybinilwy-1/16
EA/PA- 7/15-present (with my former best friend)
Trial apartment-2/16 (also when she considers us separated)
W moved out-8/16
W Filed 11/21/16
D final 1/30/17
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