So tonight the W went to view a new house (she's been staying at her moms for the last 10 weeks).
Oh how it hurts to hear her how she's moving forward.
To me it seems like a further nail in the coffin that is our marriage.
I understand that she can't remain in a bedroom at her moms and it'll be nice for my son to have more space. The W will certainly notice a difference being in her own house and having her own space - without her moms help. I highly doubt that this will bring reflection for her.
Wouldn't it be so much easier to just be able to turn these feelings off!
M - 36 / W - 32 S - 3 Together - 18 Yrs / Married - 10 Yrs Bomb Dropped - 4th Sept 2016 Moved out - 4th Sept 2016
This is just part of the path. Typically when someone says they need space, moving into their parents house isn't giving it. Let her have her space along with all the "adultness" that comes with it and without you as the safety net. It's a great opportunity for her to see and experience life without you and a great opportunity for you to keep working on you.
34, xw33 M-10, T-18 2D (8 and 5) Ilybinilwy-1/16 EA/PA- 7/15-present (with my former best friend) Trial apartment-2/16 (also when she considers us separated) W moved out-8/16 W Filed 11/21/16 D final 1/30/17
So tonight the W went to view a new house (she's been staying at her moms for the last 10 weeks).
Oh how it hurts to hear her how she's moving forward.
To me it seems like a further nail in the coffin that is our marriage.
I understand that she can't remain in a bedroom at her moms and it'll be nice for my son to have more space. The W will certainly notice a difference being in her own house and having her own space - without her moms help. I highly doubt that this will bring reflection for her.
Wouldn't it be so much easier to just be able to turn these feelings off!
First, she wasn't going to reflect because there were too many people at her parent's house and she would always have support.
Now she won't reflect because she's in a big house with all the freedom in the world.
So tonight the W went to view a new house (she's been staying at her moms for the last 10 weeks).
Oh how it hurts to hear her how she's moving forward.
To me it seems like a further nail in the coffin that is our marriage.
I understand that she can't remain in a bedroom at her moms and it'll be nice for my son to have more space. The W will certainly notice a difference being in her own house and having her own space - without her moms help. I highly doubt that this will bring reflection for her.
Wouldn't it be so much easier to just be able to turn these feelings off!
First, she wasn't going to reflect because there were too many people at her parent's house and she would always have support.
Now she won't reflect because she's in a big house with all the freedom in the world.
Hmmmmmm...
+1
34, xw33 M-10, T-18 2D (8 and 5) Ilybinilwy-1/16 EA/PA- 7/15-present (with my former best friend) Trial apartment-2/16 (also when she considers us separated) W moved out-8/16 W Filed 11/21/16 D final 1/30/17
Well she knows I'm going out more, doing a lot more things on my own - went to a fireworks show last weekend and she was angry that I would never go with her but have now (we did go before but also used to have a dog that was petrified of fireworks and would tear the house up when we weren't there). She's also noticing and commenting on my weight loss.
I am trying to keep my distance and very rarely contact her (unless it's to do with our S). I've had a couple of wobbles but don't know really what her thoughts are as of late - other than a lot of anger!
I have always thought that she won't know what's gone whilst she's at her moms, but this next step is just that - another step away from the M....
...maybe that's what she needs to see what's been lost, or as Darkness says, maybe this is just further freedom for her. In the last 10 weeks though she has hardly been out and is going to be left with very little money after renting a place on her own.
It's almost like her life hasn't changed, aperture from the fact that I'm no longer a part of it.
M - 36 / W - 32 S - 3 Together - 18 Yrs / Married - 10 Yrs Bomb Dropped - 4th Sept 2016 Moved out - 4th Sept 2016
Ok. While I know you may enjoy hearing about comments like that but, tread carefully with mutual friends. They are likely playing both sides. Don't give them anything. It just seems strange how you would think that someone would tell u things about someone else but not tell others about you.
Don't play that game. It will blow up in your face.
34, xw33 M-10, T-18 2D (8 and 5) Ilybinilwy-1/16 EA/PA- 7/15-present (with my former best friend) Trial apartment-2/16 (also when she considers us separated) W moved out-8/16 W Filed 11/21/16 D final 1/30/17
Hi J, I know that this mutual friend is much more sided towards me and wouldn't say anything to her (tbh, there's not really anything to tell).
I just find it very strange that her comments start with "if ever we were to get back together". Comments that are being made to 3rd parties. She sounds like she has some doubt in her mind, but she is sooo stubborn and I'd find it difficult to believe that she could even admit this to herself let alone one else.
M - 36 / W - 32 S - 3 Together - 18 Yrs / Married - 10 Yrs Bomb Dropped - 4th Sept 2016 Moved out - 4th Sept 2016
