New to the Boards. Marriage in Crisis.

[Chris73]

I really like what we've all constructed together for the church question. I'm going to try:

"I'm going to church on Sunday, I'd like to take the kids, and you are of course welcome to join us if you want to."

Regarding the drama addiction, Painter, you are spot on.

By nature I am non-confrontational (to a fault I might add). The thought of even starting an argument makes my pulse race and my body flushed with heat. I avoid it like the plague. I've done this all my life and my current course of therapy is helping me realize how unhealthy this is for me.

Meanwhile, after the affair was discovered, my wife and I had a few conversations about "what happened". She admitted that even in the short 5-month span of the EA/PA she would regularly get into fights/arguments with the OM. She said it made her feel alive. She even said she was mad at ME because I didn't blow my stack when I found out.

So yes, I definitely think she has a drama addiction. Something that her own therapist is (hopefully) working on with her. I haven't seen a drastic change in her behavior since I started my GaL activities. It's only been about a week since I did my 180. But I've been making future plans to do things without her and this church situation will likely make her take notice.

I just wish I could help her figure out how to find a healthy substitute for the drama she's longing for...