She moved out...now the work begins...II

[SBJ]

I think I am still mainly confused at the speed at which things have moved. 4 months today was the BOMB Drop.

I'm angry that she doesn't think we can make our marriage work. I'm angry that she is being so selfish and thinks that our kids will get thru this unscathed. I'm angry that she thinks that she is only available to me as a friend. I'm angry that my MIL is enabling my W in this endeavor. I'm angry that I have given 25+ years of my life to my W that seem totally ungrateful to her. But, thru all of this I'm not "MAD", I'm just crushed and feel like a shell of a man.

In my wife's case...I have done all of those cooking type things for her forever. I made sure that she could eat it since she is GF and preservative-free. I am an early riser, so I woke my kids up daily for school and then greeted her with a cup of coffee to wake her up. I guess I was too much of the Mr. Nice Guy for her liking.

I want to (not really) be mad so that this separation might be easier to take. I want to be able to close off my feelings to her. I want to not find her so darned attractive. But I can not do any of those things...my love runs too deep.

Two things:
1. My W makes some great pancakes too and I surely miss them...I'm a breakfast any time kind of guy.
2. But why would you think that I'm not an "Male Escort"? Just kidding...haha!