Yes, just like a teenager, he is going to be testing the boundary on text messages, etc. He's doing everything he can to rattle your cage. He tries one thing, it doesn't work to rile you up and then he tries something else. He's a very frustrated man child right now.
If I recall, he has some anxiety just before your family came to visit recently. He has nothing but time on his hands and he knows that if he goes, he's going to have to wear a "mature" mask and act like a grown up and that worries him. He's afraid that people will be watching and judging him for his actions/behavior. Of course, we all know that we don't have any control over what they say or do, but we get blamed if someone questions them about their behavior, etc. They don't realize that they tell on themselves.
I wouldn't worry to much about him and his anxiety. He'll either go or stay home w/his tree. But the most important thing is that you and your sons have a great time. I'm sure you are looking forward to coming east for the holidays.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
