Here's an idea... fall in love with your H again. Love is a choice and you take it every day. Your will power split could save many marriages on this forum. But falling in love again is what you are missing.
Your heart yearns to fall in love with him, but you don't know how you can trust him again. Who cares if you can trust him, you want to be with him, you are with him, so fall. Fall in love with him with all of your heart.
Only when you surrender your heart, will you surrender the pain. And if you're looking for trust, trust God. Humans err, God does not.
Just cos things are going right, doesn't mean that they were always wrong.
