Am I in withdrawal ... will he ever wake up

[Lana_71]

Thank you for your reply ... I will be going through the threads suggested... I really appreciate your help. Going back to my story when we were there here were my observation
1- he seemed broken ... currently living in a shared house with my other two people to lower expense... same house 4 years ago .
2- his emotional affair was with a work colleague in a different country which he seems stopped at least a year and half ago and she left the company
3- although he is working hard but all his money goes for the loan he got to buy 20% of his company
4- he does I own a car and uses company car or his friends
5-major back ache recently and uses medication all day .dr recommended a survey which he is postponing because of time, fear and maybe cost. I offered to pay for it but he declined saying he will do something
6- he stayed with us in the hotel room for all the days except once he said he had to go meet a client outside state and was at hotel in the morning breakfast
7- he was courteous civilized nice but still distance .. cash was limited so I paid for our outings dinners but he was the driver and accompanied us in all outing.
8- he took us to malls boardwalk night drive although he was working st hotel lobby all day while we were swimming then we went for lunch or dinner
9- I wanted to make it a special time for kids to see him and enjoy him
10- his main focus is to make money and all his problems will be solved
11- limited interaction. With his mom and family even when once she visited him he claimed not in state
12- he was still irritable edgy sometimes which I felt walking on egg shells
13- he seemed so preoccupied he says it is work and bank commitments . Sometimes his cell phone gets disconnected due to non payment
14- when I came back I thanked Gina hoped to keep in touch .. I renewed the offer to pay for his back operation
15- note he never apologized for anything he still feels a lot is my fault and sometimes he says he has to prove himself.
16- he loves his kids but doesnot know how to get close to them.
17- although I miss our old days living back with him in this state will be pain so maybe living back home is much better for me and kids
After we came back we sent some msg my aunt passed away he called me then he went blank I sent some msg . Small msg about kids and have it heard from him for a month now... it bothers me that although financially he can't support but he also withdraw every thing .. sometimes I feel he punishes me because I care about the kids so much . Anyway I decided not to contact him now and let it go. If it meant to be then he will contact us if not then it is what it is.