Newby here, desperate for some advice (thread 6)

[JRuss]

FG -- I too struggle with seeing how this could ever be a positive improvement in my kids' lives.

All I can ever come up with is that I should be able to be a lot more present at all times than I have been the last 20 months. There have been times when, despite my best efforts, I've been completely lost in my own head worrying and fretting and stressing about the sitch, and I'll suddenly realize I haven't been listening to D, or S wants to show me something, and I'm not awake for him. And maybe removing me from the picture will make W happier and also a better parent.

So 50% less time with each parent, but better time in both instances with a fully engaged parent is the argument. I don't know if it's a good one, but when I'm trying to cope with all of the guilt I feel at not being able to salvage this situation for them, it sometimes helps somewhat.

lt -- I've noticed that anger, especially, is closely related to my then-level of emotional fatigue. It's under there lurking all the time, but it only ever seems to come out at all when I'm tired and feeling overwhelmed.