Aahhhh... Autumn! My favorite time of year! Just got home from a trip to Michigan State where my 2sister in laws and daughter visited my niece. What a beautiful weekend!
With autumn, comes the many, many things I love... Along with some traces of... Stuff...
Post BD- three years, now. Can't even remember the exact day, and my brain no longer functions in a way to fish for those minute details...
Xh's bday...
And what would have been 20th wedding anniversary, yesterday...
Now! Let me say, I am in a place I could have never even imagined. Ever! Thank God!
I'm still drawn here. I have a place in my heart for the amazing cyber friend ships and support I have found here. And sometimes I just need that little bit of... Reality? Perspective? (One of my all-time favorites!) Encouragement?
Well... New developments? I can say that I continue to remain as dark as the universe allows. Even with 2 kids, we have no reason to communicate and xh has reached his limit to which his narcissistic ego will allow him to be ignored. S19 has no contact and is away at college. He's an adult and it's his choice. D15 and I moved to a diff town and I solely take care of her. 100%. Although she is limited contact, the have *something* and I stay out of it. It's more like an out of town uncle (even though she has a better r with my Bros)... But it is what it is and it's theirs. The most damaging part is his constant pushing of his new family on her. But she's working it out.
So, back to developments, as I'm less than a bi-stander or observer due to the lack of anything. I wouldn't have it any other way. It's best for me. Especially with a clearer understanding of co-dependent and narcissistic relationships.
So here it is:
1) xh in a very cowardly way, informed d15 he was bringing the baby to her vball games. D15 shut it down. The way it was done was nauseating- on his part. Honestly, I saw it coming. Pre-baby I could read this sitch like a book- I swear! She hates he was going nights to see her. And, of course dosent trust him, and clearly, what other way to make a statement? So you know... I know it would never sit well w her. Plus, he'd see me there w bf... Yadda yadda
What I know bout xh- he'd NEVER WANT to take a toddler ANYWHERE! Let alone by himself and to a volleyball game!
But, like I said, I saw it coming from the jump. I could go on, but why bother?!
Oh! But, even this! D15 said no way! He didn't really come anymore. I don't think it was allowed. Oh so sad... And unreal... To have someone come into a family, then decide when and how a father can see his daughter. Weird.
2) my brothers saw xh the other day. My oldest has not seen xh since this has all gone down... 3 years!!
Xh turned the corner and there they were. He walked up to them and put out his hand to shake. Bro said nope. Xh said, come on... Bro shoes him away with his hand. Oh I love him!
3) xh is getting married! Well, those of you who know me from around the way know how I would have handled that... Ha- it's whatev. I'm literally smirking right now.
Anyway, I'm doing this on my phone, and that's a lot to type on a phone!!
