Hi Coly, the last time I saw XH (2 years ago and when he was seeing his AP) he told me he still felt swept away by love for me, wanted to take my hand and be romantic with me.

When he told me that, I told him we wouldn't have any sort or R, whilst he chose to conduct a R with someone else. Perhaps I was a little blunt, but that was truly the case for me. Now you would think that if someone felt that way, he wouldn't have chosen to file for D and so on - but there we are. That was the way he said he felt about me last time he saw me.

I'm also quite sure that if I had given an inch, he would have taken a mile. He was flying off to see OW the following week I later discovered.

I guess the message is - yes, MLCers do that kind of stuff. Feelings for the spouse are still buried in there somewhere. But (and this is where boundaries are so important) - until someone actually wants to be 'all in' and can be a suitable partner - it's not worth paying that much attention to that kind of stuff....

JMHO of course - take the gesture for what it was - a momentary show of affection. Enjoy that moment and keep moving forwards.... smile X

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus