So ridiculously sad. Please help

[LiM]

You're doing good Molly. Keep it up. You need to be working on you right now and it seems like you are doing a good job. In order to get your M back, you have to be willing to let it go. He needs to see that he has completely lost you. It's then, sitting in the $h!t pile that he made, that he will come to grips with what he has done. Let him sit there for as long as it takes. Taking out the trash and changing your tires does not make up for what he did. He has some serious work to do on his own issues. Getting into IC is a MUST for him as far as I'm concerned.
DO NOT let him back to easily. Make him work for it. Your R will be better for it.
If he keeps coming to the house to shower, I'd change the locks. You can't kick him out of the house but he left of his own accord. So I think you'd be justified in changing the locks.