You shouldn't be jealous of the ow...she's got "used/damaged" goods. She is the one that is jealous of you and what you had w/your h.
Always remember, she's going to do her best to out do whatever you did w/your h. She's the one that is constantly comparing herself to you. Don't fall into the trap of comparing yourself to her...she's not worth it. After all, she's living in the house built on top of sand (lies).
I'm glad you've got a Reiki session booked. It's time you did something for yourself.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
