Well, I do think the feelings of MLCs are real. How people behave in response to those feelings varies quite a bit.
To be honest, the drink driving and working is the part that concerns me. I haven't faced that situation, so I can't say for sure, but that might be more than I could live with.
I don't see anything wrong with him staying later than you and the kids. H and I have started leaving separately because it works better for us than negotiating a departure time.
Me: 44 H: 44 Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10 Together/Married: 22 years H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16 H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16