Thanks Esame and Bttrfly - good to hear from you both.

One thing I forgot to post is I asked SS to give PIL my best wishes this weekend. You may recall I have been pretty raw that XH's family (who I thought I was close to) just dropped me at such a difficult time.

SS looked a little surprised and asked if we kept in touch. I told him no and that they didn't choose to, and I could understand they may find it awkward given our R/M has ended.

SS said - yeah my Dad's family are a bit weird - it's a bit like - oh you've split up - Okay...Delete.
He also reminded me that XH's GPs who were nice, but real authority figures, would just airbrush ex-partners out of family photos if they split up. It was like a given in the family that once you're out, you're out. There's no culture of - actually, you know what I really like you and I want to keep in touch anyway.

The convo seemed to help anyway and we had a bit of a laugh about it. SS seeming to feel - well, it's all a bit dysfunctional, but I love them - which is fair enough.

Anyway, just wanted to throw in that addendum....xx

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus