For those of us who knew Jack Three Beans aka Jeff, JTB, or just plain Jack you will agree he would hate a thread dedicated to some of the wisdom he shared on these pages.
BUT
To honor the true essence of the man and to attempt to provide a place to find some great words from a great man as you move on your path through this.... I thought I would start this thread and Job will sticky this to the top of our forum.
So please share your Jackisms and those famous 2x4s he was known for wielding.
I found this on my thread and I think it appropriate to kick off this thread:
Originally Posted By: Jack Three Beans
I know what you mean...when I'm dead standing in front of St. Peter I am sure as heck going to be worried about what strangers thought of me back when I was alive. smile
Come on Grace...F them. Go do for you and screw what MOST people may think.
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
Here is a quote that one of our moderators, sgctxok, posted:
Jeff/Jack's first post was to help someone else. A great quote from that post,
"If you wife is worth fighting for, then your marriage is worth waiting for."--Jack Three Beans
It's a quote he lived. _________________________ sg
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Jack, you touched so many lives... Every time I don't feel like talking to my husband I recall what you told me - that many LBSs would give a kidney to talk - and I talk to him.
Your messages will stay with us forever. All my thoughts are with your family. _________________________ M: 41 H: 50 2S: 13 & 15 H moved out Feb 2016
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Jack posted this for me back in August, when I was considering telling H about a comment S10 made at the time:
"Esame,
About children and the MLCer.
Its a hard thing to do, should he be aware of what your son said?
That's a tough question.
Advice I'd offer is that if you choose to make him aware, do it generally. I wouldn't specifically tell him word for word what your son said, but that your son seems to be concerned and maybe he or both of you could talk to him about it.
I tried my best to insulate my boys and kept things very general with them about what was going on, and with her regarding things they said about her when they did.
I believe guilt a is very big part of the MLCer and adding to it makes them sort of rabbit away from sources of guilt quickly."
I can see now that if I told H about every negative comment the kids made I would a) be using to the kids and b) pushing H further away...
"There's nothing sadder than a conman conning himself"
“There is freedom waiting for you, On the breezes of the sky, And you ask "What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, What if you fly?”
This really isn't any advice, but Jack posted this to me very early in my sitch and it is something that I've always remembered, but really couldn't even relate to until fairly recently:
I wouldn't trade who I have become for anything.
Thanks Jack.
Tad
Currently: M 56 XW 57 Sons 38,33,31,29
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13