Btw, I realised that even if I prefaced my statements with 'I feel that....', kid's father would always feel attacked.
That's just how some men work. So, skip this talk about feelings step entirely.
Just deal with the demands and try to see if you can solve it/ change the dynamics at that level.
This really has to do with The M rather than the A.
Try not to lump too many issues together or you will be writhing in resentment and your H may give up because he feels that there is nothing he can do to redeem himself.
A issues would be: Transparency NC with OW Boundaries Sense of security Rebuilding love etc.
Btw, I am not a therapist so I think it's a good idea to get a gottman or mwd affliated ic to help you.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
