So I've read the entire DR book. I feel like I am in the experiment phase of figuring out what works and what doesn't. over the past few weeks I have detached and started to GAL working out and going out with friends. she is definenently responding. Or so I think. I remember what you said Sandi about the WW and how manipulative they can be. Here is what I am now experiencing based on my actions.
I started by Truely detaching. Thinking her more as a good friend rather than spouse. Not letting her actions effect me and not initiating much engagement. Also I have GAL, working out etc. She has all of a sudden become very into telling me about her day in detail. Also, if she's out late I find her overexplaining to me what she's doing and why. She has been throwing things into the conversation that allude to the future such as, "when we retire we're going to have a buddy with us! (alluding to my son with Down syndrome)". It's all in a positive tone. I feel she is perhaps leaving bread crumbs to keep me at bay or she suspects I may know about the affair as I STILL haven't confronted her. (Yes I know this is bad). Even though it might be a bit disengenious, isn't this progress? At least we are engaging in conversation!
I am struggling with the right time to bring up the A.With the momentum I have I'm worried about derailing by bringing up the A and have the small progress I'm seeing unravel. Is waiting in this situation a bad idea?
