Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 5

[PsySara]

I will try to answer the questions as I can remember.

Yes WH was always critical before the A, in his defense Iw as as well. What's funny is I was actively working diminishing my criticism a few months leading up to his A. I made sure not to criticize the way he cleaned or helped out with the kids. Instead I made sure to validate his help and point out that I really appreciated it. Sigh. A few months later the bomb drops.

Initially I demanded MC and made him set up the appointment. He went to three sessions and barely talked to the counselor. He would just stare at the floor and give a few words. Even the MC was frustrated with WH's stone walling. Finally WH said he didn't want to go anymore, that was Dec 2015. When I have brought up IC and Mc he refuses saying he has nothing to ask. He is not interested in any points of view save his own. Pride is a HUGE issue here yet he swears it's not. Sure.

The frustration is WH will sometimes ask if he offended me, when I tell him how I feel he begins to argue and tell me how I am wrong and misinterpret the conversation. He really thinks that his thoughts are the only valid ones and that everyone else's is simply misunderstanding.One of the reasons I wanted MC was so we could have a neutral third party re-frame the conversations so our communication could be better.

I have been careful to say, "This made me feel like this...." so it's more about my feelings and not blaming him. Maybe he will become more receptive to counseling as I become more successful at DBing.

Tonight he went to McD's and bought the kids and himself dinner, nothing for me. Then he went out and bought something for his office. He just walked in and is actually being more civil to me so I will sign off now and try to "act as if."