Morality Clause in D decree???

[ericmsant2]

SBJ

I just caught up with your thread and wanted to point out a few things.

You are getting very good advice.

This decision to “stand” for your M while your spouse is in the midst of a crisis is a very personal one. This decision IMO, has less to do with the “legal” marriage and more to do with the “emotional” marriage. The legal M is just that – a legal contract.

Standing IMO, requires that YOU truly DETACH. It is the only way to survive this. It protects you from continuing to deal with the hurt and pain that is slung your way from someone who is batchit crazy right now. Think about….the more hurt slung your way, the more stuff you have to deal with NOW and potentially later should reconciliation occur.

I want to remind you of what you said on Oct 20th.

I love my W 100% and I am willing to STAND as long as I have to save things.

I guess the question you need to ask yourself…is do you love her enough to really LET her GO. Because you will need to. You need to LET HER GO..so that SHE can work through the stuff that she needs to work through.

I walk by faith even when I cannot see. 1 Corinthians 5:7 (I believe)

On Oct 23rd.. you posted this ^^^^^ . My question to you….is do you think you live this? Do you think that you can let go and just walk by faith?

As for telling the kids about any potential divorce – IMO, you should be there. This is not about standing up to her – it is about being there for YOUR kids. I do not believe that you should proclaim “I did not want this”, as that does nothing to help the kids deal with this. Trust me when I tell you that they will figure it out over time. Please just remind your kids that this has nothing to do with them. It is not there fault. This is what they will need to hear.

As for a “Morality Clause” – I would not bother. It is a form of control and cannot really be enforced.

She told me that she found a condo to rent and that she was moving out in a couple of weeks. Saying that we don't hardly talk anymore and things keep getting worse. I don't know what to do.

As for her moving – let her. It is HER choice. She just may need to do this in order to continue to work through her chit. The kids should stay with you, or at a min. your home should be their primary since that is what THEY are used to.


Chin up dude – I know this stinks. You will make it through this.