Ok ... so those reasons really have little to do with you and more to do with her right?
So here is something for you to do .... this was taught to me here and was the start of my journey.
The List:
List #1 list out 10 things you like about yourself List #2 list out 10 things you do not like about yourself .... CAREFUL this is not 10 complaints your spouse has/had .. 10 legit things that YOU do not like about yourself. List #3 list 10 things you admire in other men, men you know, admire from afar etc.
Now print this list out where only you can see it on a regular basis ... I had a copy in my bedroom after the separation, and another in my office at work. every week focus on ONE item from list #2, and attempt to replace it from ONE item from list #3. I highlighted this and every week had a fresh copy and did it again. It doesn't happen overnight, and often I had to work on something from list 2 several times before I felt I could cross it off (Some things 2 years later are STILL there and still a work in progress) .. I still have the lists and I still have items from that first time there, but I will tell you they may have been at 90 then they are a 30 now. Some things I had to eliminate and replace with somethings else as I conquered certain issues I wanted to eliminate from my life. Some things are harder .. took me 40+ years to become who I am and it will always be a work in progress ... key term PROGRESS as I strive to get better day by day.
SBJ and anyone else reading .. this is the beginning of growth, this is where I began transforming myself into a better person one item at a time.
