MLC & Alcoholic

[HaWho]

Oh wow Kdvor, I heard ALL that same stuff with only slight variations.

I am sorry. All I can tell you is to re-read Job's advice again and again. Those pointers are what got me through the early days.

Other things that helped: I played music, played lots of board games w/my kids and baked. One thing I learned is you don't want his energy to dominate the home. You want to create the energy for your kids and for yourself; this is something I still have to do to this day. My advice is start this right off. No matter how awful you are feeling, do things each and every day that make it cheerful for your kids, even if you just burn a candle that makes the house smell nice.

Another helpful bit of advice is to make sure you are making eye contact with your kids, tousling their hair, smiling at them, hugging them, etc. Those small things are very reassuring to them.

Esame has also given you great advice. The fatigue of depression is very real. I am surprised your h recognized he IS in depression! He just doesn't have it in him and he's not faking. The more you ask for help/ask him to do his part the more he'll pull away.

I don't have any family here and I just did it myself. It was hard. But, honestly? Some MLCers insist on trying to run off with full custody of their kids. I was always thankful that my h had no interest in going this route. I cannot imagine turning my kids over to a crazy person.

My suspicion is you've already been doing most of the work anyway as he's been drifting off for a while now. You are stronger than you know!