Hey Feyth. This is hard and dealing with L is...well, "yucky". And I have a few in my family (including a federal judge). Still yucky. Concentrate on what you need and what you want and understand that part of what you hear is your H and his fear of losing any assets or money, part is MLC weirdness, and a big part is L driven tactical stuff. My L kept asking me what I wanted and needed over and over through the process (it didn't change much), but when we sat down at final mediation she opened with a crazy extreme position that would have been impossible for H. I had to fight to keep my mouth closed. It was really just to see how they countered. Tactics.

We don't know what is going on in someone's head. Its even worse when that someone has paid for someone else to look after their best interests who doesn't care about you at all. Try to remember...you have to look out for you. Use your L to do that. Don't worry about what is going on in your H's head. Trust me; that is not a place you'd want to visit right now. Its more Halloween than Christmas in that noggin. So yeah. You don't know that guy while you are dealing with his L. It HAS to be business. And I can guarantee, his venture into the land of law is making him uncomfortable too. This is no fun from either side. But since he feels the need to do this, what can you do? Let your L take care of this business. It worked pretty well for me to detach from the legal stuff a bit and just really concentrate on looking good and being "at ease', making eye contact and trying to smile a bit (being "light and breezy" its been called by another poster) whenever we had to meet. It may not have been how I felt inside, but it was my way of showing control during the uncomfortable, uncontrollable sitch. And don't discuss the D with H without your L. If he brings it up, let him talk, but just validate and move on to something else. Leave that sh%$ for the Ls. Its business. Outside? You are the wonderful woman they'd be a fool to leave. Prove it.

Hugs to you. You are a rockstar and you know it! Look at all you've done and overcome when putting your mind to it. Don't let this be a mountain when its really just a little hill in your path.

You've got this!


M-51 H-54
2D-27 and 25
M-26 yrs
Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15
He moved out 10-3-15
D filed 1-27-16
D final 10-27-16

Kindness, kindness, kindness.