Summer Fling turned into nightmare

[LiM]

Bluethre,

Never thought I'd be giving advice to a WS and yet here I am. I would think being humble and remorseful are the main things you need to focus on. There are books on "how to help your spouse heal from your affair." I recommend you find those on Amazon and read them. Its not ok that your H has also gone out and slept with OW during this. Clearly, he is acting out and trying to take revenge. That's not ok but I think you understand why he did. He's angry and hurt and he feels the M is over so he thought he can do whatever he wants.
Knowing that your S has been with another person is about the most devastating thing that can be known to a S. It hurts to the core of our being. It will forever leave a whole in our souls.
We can recover from it. We can go on to have a better R than we had before. But we can also choose not to.
It sounds like your A has ended and will not continue. But trust has been broken and that will take time to recover. Both of you will need to work on rebuilding trust in each other.
I would encourage you, like others have, to really dig deep and find out why you thought this was OK. What was missing in your M? What made your M vulnerable to an A? It still doesn't excuse your decision to have an A but there are things that made your M vulnerable to it. Find those things and work on them.