New to the 180. Help?

[Sotto]

"Truly detaching and planning a life without him creates a no-lose scenario for you. There are two outcomes. Both good. Outcome 1, he snaps out of his stupidity and wants to put in the work to repair your M. That's good. Outcome 2, he continues his destructive ways, you divorce him, but because you detached and were executing your plan of moving on, the D doesn't crush you. It frees you and you pursue your post-M new life happy and healthy. That's also good."

I can remember the penny dropping for me with this. Great - I am in such a terrible place and there is a 'you can't lose' option - that one's for me. And I have wholeheartedly followed that path. I do think you can choose to stand for your M with option 2, which is what I chose to do - albeit separated and fully living my own life while he carried (carries?) on his A. And he chose to initiate the D process.

So, I would encourage you to take the win/win path too