You can talk to him about your child or possibly bills, the house, and business between you. You do need to schedule some fun adult things to do. I don't mean adult in a bad way. I mean fun activities for you and maybe other adults to engage in on your own. Without him.
Your schedule belongs to you 100% now. You and your son. Hubby wants off the team so you DO NOT plan any of your activities by him. You don't make your daily schedule with any regard to him at all. You return calls when it's convenient for you to do so. WAS's/WS's HATE when you detach and start to move on without them and are happy about it. You being happy about it really gets to them. They want power over the entire situation and by following the DB guidelines you take that power away from them and give it back to yourself.
Truly detaching and planning a life without him creates a no-lose scenario for you. There are two outcomes. Both good. Outcome 1, he snaps out of his stupidity and wants to put in the work to repair your M. That's good. Outcome 2, he continues his destructive ways, you divorce him, but because you detached and were executing your plan of moving on, the D doesn't crush you. It frees you and you pursue your post-M new life happy and healthy. That's also good.
Following the plan really does create a no-lose situation for you. Sometimes you detach so well, like in my case, that your spouse snaps out of their stupid ways and wants to come back and you're the one who is now not sure you want them back.
I went from crying and groveling like a baby to telling her that she's a cheater and I don't want to be married to a cheater. I told her I was going to be just fine without her and would find love again with a woman with integrity. I filed for D myself to set myself free. The ultimate detachment that I learned from the DB method (tweaked to my taste of course, I recommend everyone do that).
I went from pursuer to pursued. I flipped the entire script and it was she that had to convince me to stay, not the other way around.
In life your are worth exactly what you think you are. If you think you have no worth then you don't. You have to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you have worth. You have a lot to offer and if he can't see it then so be it, you detach, you move on, you GAL. I have seen many relationships saved when the LBS took this very action and in the cases where it still ends in D then the LBS is healthy and well on their way to happy. It really is a no-lose program.
