I agree with you there, CM. As an HD woman myself, I wonder if I could really live the rest of my marriage wondering if my H was having "obligatory" sex with me. Like you, I enjoy being desired and chased a little bit. I know it's a little more difficult for a man to fake desire, but I can still tell when he's really into it and when he's just doing it so I'll get off his back.
I guess what makes my situation different is that my H admits he is LD and says he doesn't want to be that way any more because he knows it is going to mean the end of our marriage. If your wife knew, point blank, that either she has to change (desire is a matter of choice in many ways, not just a physical reaction) or the marriage is over, would she do it? I'm not saying you should give her this ultimatum, but I'm just wondering if she really knows that (a) her lack of desire is having a devastatingly negative effect on the M and (b) there is help for women, like her, who feel a lack of desire.
If she knows these things, and is still choosing the "do nothing" route, then I would say the answer to your original question is no, there is really not much hope left for your M. And, if that's the case, I think it's an awfully selfish move on her part to not even want to TRY to make things better.
