There is not many of us left here, I still come here and post to those from my tribe (end of 2014 beginning of 2015.) I'm not ready to let go of these people just yet.
RD left the board, in not such a great place. Have a read of his thread. It got really hard for him in the end, and I understand from those that keep in touch with him, that he has maintained his humor and good heart, but still not found freedom. If you ever have the time to lend your ear and heart to him, I am sure he would appreciate it.
As for the others, well it does for what it does, the evolution of situations, that involve children, are more complicated that yours and mine were ever going to be. Small blessings right! I feel their pain as if it was my own. But that are good people, who are doing the work, with what they have available to them. I admire them and love them more than any of them could ever know.
I am glad your have found the type of success and personal fulfillment that your journey has taken you on, sometimes a disaster in one's life is the stepping stone, to some so beautiful and true. I knew great love existed and I found it. I have found such great healing from the special man that is in my life. I feel myself healing more every day. I struggle at times, with how happy I am in may life, and yet the very dear friends I made here, continue to gain their freedom.
I have vowed to myself that they are my friends and provided relief to me at at time when death seemed far too inviting. So I will run with them on this marathon until they can revel in the same freedom that you and I experience.
I am fortunate to have called her friend at a hard time in my life, I hope I get to call you friend in the abundance.
My wife's birthday is this month and I will wish her a happy birthday but that's it, anything more would seem like pursuit.
Does my something really lovely from the kids then nothing from me. Card from kids too. Is that okay - surely it's wrong not to do that! I had decided on a card but I think not from me.
Surfer.
M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids Issues2009 Wpartying w/g.f's2013on EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR ImeetAP/EAhalts VariousBDDates MFCourse WSpew EAresumes I halt Wrages DBIng4/2016
"Does helping to kids to make something really lovely from the them but nothing from me count as pursuit? Card from kids too. Is that okay - surely thats okay? I had decided on a card but I have changed my mind and think not from me now."
Typos apologies.
Surfer.
M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids Issues2009 Wpartying w/g.f's2013on EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR ImeetAP/EAhalts VariousBDDates MFCourse WSpew EAresumes I halt Wrages DBIng4/2016
I did. Amazing. Very inspirational. Don't fancy the pitch black room to teach me about accepting pain - but I will read up on that. Loved the way your brought Ernest alive.
You have a talent for presenting. There's something of the theatre in you I think.
I am very pleased for you. You seem to have found peace. Perfect.
Surfer.
M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids Issues2009 Wpartying w/g.f's2013on EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR ImeetAP/EAhalts VariousBDDates MFCourse WSpew EAresumes I halt Wrages DBIng4/2016
I recently reread Victor Frankl's "Man's Search for Meaning". My friend misremembered the book and said something like 'Wasn't he able to find happiness in the middle of a concentration camp', and I find that's a common misnomer. Sure, he had moments of relief, or moments of appreciation, but nowhere did he express that he found some type of lasting joy and solace. But he did talk about finding meaning in the suffering, and the importance of having a reason to get through it.
When I watch your video it is powerful for the same reason. You give us good reasons to find meaning in pain. To develop into better people. To avoid the fear and anxiety and futility of running from it, and the consequences of the destructive behavior that follows those failed attempts. And most importantly, the ability to remain connected with the joy and love that is around us and in us.
The way you were able to validate the pain that we all endure was tremendous.
I am not writing a review of your video, I am not here to critique even with praise. I just really wanted to say thank you for the work you've put in and for sharing it.
Please do continue to check in once in a while. And let us know when the book is out!
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15