Cherry. He's gone, but the drama has not

[Surfer]

Cherry

Yes him not coming home should provide fairly immediate relief in terms of eggshell walking. That's good. Time is now your free friend. You have at least 6 months before a D can happen. Forget the whole verbal divorce routine - I think it was just him being crazy and dramatic. From what you said it wasn't performed correctly anyway. Just focus on 6 months at least to work on you and your babies.

Re: toxic house. Of course it was. That's a why he keeps calling back. He 'felt' toxic. He was projecting his feelings onto the house. Think about it. A house can be no more toxic than a flower. It's the relationship inside the house and he still keeps coming back to that that...the good news is he has not let go of you.

Also, with him popping back and talk of interviewing other men. That's all control. Popping back is temp checking. Interviewing other men? What a pile of @rap. Exactly how many would he give you the nod on? I will tell you how many - precisely none. No he is trying to stay in control of you - at least in his mind. I would ignore all that nonsense.

It's important that you pay no mind to him now. Get back in the saddle. Use this time to GAL, be happy with your S and have fun. Be kind to you and enjoy the space. Like me you enjoy your own space. TBH I think like me you are probably just as happy pottering at home as you are in a group and often happier just at home. A home bird as such I think. IDK - if you are that will bring calm but be careful to get out too!

I am a bit unsure about what to say on the constant temp checking. I feel like you should be less availble for this. I have seen it myself. It's control and I think allowing someone to control is not good. I would be keen to hear what any others might think about it( should you set boundaries? How if so? Not sure.

Surfer.