Deadline for Decision 8/15

[Sotto]

Hi Chippie, I'm sorry to hear about where things are at. It sounds as though your H very much has a wayward mindset just now and what he wants is for you to endorse what he'd like to do - ie: date and remain in the M.

If that's not what you want, I would be crystal clear about that boundary. For me, it was a hill I was willing to die on, and yes our M has ended, but in truth I would rather be single than live in that way again. Being with XH whilst he was secretly in touch with others was the worst thing, so I do empathise with your situation.

I guess the message from me is - he will do what he will do - that's up to him. However, you get to decide what you want to do. You have absolute control over you and what you want from your life going forwards.

Before BD, XH told me a story about a colleague of his who had multiple A's, and he and his W separated many times, before ultimately being together whilst he continued to date from time to time. XH told me this as though it was some kind of success story. Looking back, I realise he was hoping for some endorsement of an A that was ongoing at that time - ugh. Any ways, the endorsement was never forthcoming and here I am..

Xx