Now if I was to remarry, I would not have expectations that the new husband would have to support and take care of my child. That would not be fair to him. But that lifestyle that comes with having a child is not easy and not for everyone. Regardless. I don't even know how to navigate something like that. I haven't thought that far in advance, but how can it not be difficult?
But why be with me when I cannot offer that honeymoon period of travel and dating and irresponsibility? Right now, this guys adores me because of the superficial stuff which is unsustaining. I worry that after a certain amount of time, i lose my appeal and become mundane and am valued less, which is what happened with husband. Real life is not fun. So what's in it for him if it's not his kid, And the lifestyle itself is not appealing? What keeps someone around? Will love and committment exist for me? My fear comes from no longer having trust that ones partner will be as committed as I am.
I do fear growing attachéd to someone only having to grieve or be rejected by them. I don't necessarily feel needy.
I don't worry about sex, because I like sex, and my experience (and that of many of my friends and women that I talk to) is one in which the husband was unable to. In fact, it's a big motivator for me in wanting a relationship with someone. Because I'm incapable of emotionless sex or one night stands.
